GRIEF

I feel as though I've been thrown
Into the deepest part of the ocean
And left completely alone.
I can see the blue of the sky
And the dark black below
And I'm drowning in grief.
It wraps around me like the cold salt water
And I can't find my way to the warm shore
And I can't see the horizon at all.
I'm lost in thoughts and memories
And none of them warm me at all.
My favorite part of Christmas
Is the beautiful bittersweet melancholy
That fills the holidays with a velvet warmth
And I revel in it.
But nothing like that exists in grief.
It's an ice pick
That finds the one wound that has finally healed
And opens it, twisting slowly
Making sure you don't have a second, a moment
     a day, a week, a month
With no pain
But there is healing in nature
And glory in the stars, sweetness in the wind
And someday the universe will teach me how
To turn grief to grace.